Da Shitz On Sportz

If anybody is thinking that New York Yankee slugger Alex Rodriguez reached an amicable agreement with his wife Cynthia to spare his children from messy divorce proceedings because of his numerous infidelities, pull your head out of your ass right now because the only reason he did it was to save himself the embarrassment and shame of having to name other high profile women he has hit home runs with in the divorce proceedings.

For once when he was thinking with the head on his shoulders instead of the one dangling at the end of that teeny, weenie bat dangling between his thighs, and he did the right thing by agreeing to his ex-wife’s divorce terms, but don’t anybody think he did it out of respect for his children and his wife or to spare them emotional trauma. He did it to save his own sorry ass.

Cynthia may have been doing what is in the best interests of their two children, but not A-Rod. All he wanted was to make sure that he could screw Cynthia out of as much money as her and children rightfully deserved, but that plan went foul when his scorned wife demanded more than what was agreed to in the prenup she signed a month before they were married in 2002.

While terms of the divorce settlement weren’t released it is believed that Cynthia received a $12 million mansion, and enough spousal and child support to keep her and the two children living in the luxury they have become accustomed to for a long time to come. There are also rumours that Cynthia may have received a one-third share of what A-Rod earned during their marriage, and that she may have threatened to reveal all about their 6-year marriage and A-Rod’s secrets if she didn’t get what she wanted out of A-Rod. The divorce settlement isn’t as amicable as the New York Daily News is reporting by any stretch of the imagination, and contrary to what their PR reps and attorneys are saying, things could get a whole lot uglier between the two, divorce settlement or not.

The funniest thing I have heard about this divorce so far is that A-Rod has chastised Cynthia for mentioning “immaterial and impertinent” issues like his alleged “extra marital affairs and other marital misconduct.”

Earth to A-Rod, it was those extramarital affairs and marital misconduct that caused your marriage to fail you stupid moron.

He’s lucky that Florida is a no-fault state for divorce cases, but at the end of the day that means nothing when it comes to the leverage Cynthia has when it comes to getting what she wants out of the infidel and arrogant prick.

I expect that Cynthia will have quite a story to sell one day and that she might have even used the threat of selling that story to pressure A-Rod into giving her what she wanted from him.

Of course I could be very, very wrong about how this divorce settlement was reached, but I doubt it, especially when everybody and their dog were expecting it to be a messy and expensive divorce for A-Rod in the first place.

Truth be told, I think Cynthia played dirty and won. I also think that there’s still time for this divorce to get really ugly before it runs it course.

Yankees Star Alex Rodriguez Settles Divorce

Fore-Get About It, There’s Nothing Wrong With The LPGA Expecting International Players To Learn English-Players Making A Mountain Out Of A Mole Hill

A few feathers have been ruffled with the LPGA’s announcement that foreign players will have to learn enough English to interact with journalists, other players, and their sponsors, and to be honest I don’t see what the big deal is when learning English is beneficial to players who otherwise can’t be bothered.

It’s a bullshit argument being made by players who if the truth were told are just blowing smoke out of their ass for the sake of argument. There is nothing wrong with expecting players to learn a language that is dominant on the LPGA tour, and for anybody to suggest that players who spend a tremendous amount of time in English speaking countries due to their career demands shouldn’t have some grasp of the English language is absurd.

Think about it, when a major corporation in an English speaking country hires somebody from a foreign country to work for them, that person is required to be able to speak English, otherwise that person is of no benefit to the company. Of course some will make the argument that the LPGA isn’t a corporate entity, that it’s a “professional sports organization”, but we all know that that argument is bullshit given the money-making machine it is, and the fact that they rely on corporate sponsors, most of which come from the U.S.

Maybe it’s just me, and maybe my argument doesn’t make sense, but if you are going to work, play and make your home in an English speaking country, the least one can do is learn to speak the language instead of relying on interpreters who don’t always get the translation right.

All I have left to say to the naysayers is, “Get over it and play golf.”

NFL Commissioner Shows Once Again That He Has No Balls

Seventeen months ago, the NFL suspended Adam “Pacman” Jones after he accumulated a number of arrests and legal probems that as far as a lot NFL fans are concerned, brought the league into disrepute.

Jones isn’t the only NFL player to do that, in fact that are quite a number of NFL players who time and time again are arrested and charged with criminal offences, and like Jones almost all of them are (it’s a rare occasion when the NFL kicks anybody out of the league for their off field behaviour) re-instated after serving suspensions, and then some of those players go on to commit further criminal offences.

Jones, now that he has been re-instated, says he’ll “try” to change his ways so that he can stay in the league. Try? What does mean by that, is he saying that he’ll make an effort to avoid his criminal behaviour when he should be saying, “It won’t happen again?” It sounds to me like Jones isn’t willing to commit to staying out of trouble, that he doesn’t think he can.

The NFL should have never re-instated him, especially since he has been arrested six times and has been involved in a dozen incidents that required police to arrive on the scene since; the Tennessee Titans first drafted him only three years ago. F**k man, he was even connected to a shooting in Las Vegas. What more does the NFL commissioner need to keep this arrogant, anti-social football player out of the NFL for good? It makes no sense and shows just how spineless the NFL commissioner is when it comes to players who don’t want to conform to societal values and morals. Guys like Pacman are a black mark on the NFL and until the commission grows big enough balls or is replaced by somebody with bigger balls, anti-social players like Pacman will continue to bring the game into disrepute, if only because they know that the worst that is likely going to happen to them is a suspension, which by the way they can afford to serve given the amount of money they are paid to play the game.

Suspension and fines mean shit to players who are making millions of dollars a season.

Mark my words, Pacman Jones will be arrested and charged again because that’s just the kind of guy he is, and when that happens the NFL commissioner is going to look like a fool.

These days, if an NFL player doesn’t kill somebody or his or her dog, they’re good to go in the NFL. What a f**king joke that standard is!

Bulldog Unleashed: The Most Cowardly Footy Player In Australia Free To Play Rugby, Avoids Jail

(follow up to Sonny Boy Williams’s story)

Sooner or later the Sonny Boy Williams’s saga was going to end, and a short time before today’s DSOS blog entry was published today, the story broke that Sonny Boy’s new handlers (Toulon) had managed to work out a deal with the National Rugby League’s Canterbury Bulldogs that will release him from his contract and allow him to play rugby anywhere in the world (provided of course he is capable of honoring the 2-year deal he signed with Toulon). The cost to Toulon, $AU750,000, which apparently came via world boxing champion Anthony Mundine.

Whether it was Toulon’s money, or Anthony Mundine’s money, the prick is history in the National Rugby League, and that’s good for Australian rugby.

I bet Sonny Boy had to suck and swallow a lot of French dick to get Toulon to bail him out of his deal with the Bulldogs, huh, and likely Anthony Mundine’s too.

The deal is done, and for the next 2 years, Toulon owns the most injury prone and cowardly professional 23-year-old rugby player Australia has ever seen.

Good-bye Sonny Boy Williams, may your career in French rugby be filled with many footballs stuffed up your sorry little ass.

He’s a f**king coward, and he won’t be missed.

Sonny Bill released from doghouse

Message To Jets Fans: Don’t Get Your Hopes Up Just Yet

It’s been almost two weeks since “sooky baby” NFL quarterback Brett Favre chased  Chad Pennington out of New York, and after all the hype surrounding the trade that saw the New York Jets relieve the Green Bay Packers of their grief,  the much hyped debut of Favre last Saturday night has come and gone, and Favre who managed to last 14 plays against the Washington Redskins despite his whining about how tired and sore his throwing arm was earlier in the week, managed to throw a 4-yard touch down pass in the Jets 13-10 loss.

Now while Favre managed to engineer a 7-3 lead for the Jets before he came off the field, if I were a Jet fan I wouldn’t expect too many quality games out of a 38-year-old man who is  too dumb to realize that his performance was more a fluke than it was skill or talent, and that if it wasn’t for his Green Bay team mates Favre wouldn’t have the season he had in 2007.

That said, while he is the NFL’s only three time MVP, he is now as out-of-date as jug of curdled milk sitting at the back of a supermarket fridge.

While I’ll admit that during an 18-game NFL season there are plenty of opportunities for Favre to string together a few good performances, I’m sorry to say for Jet fans that Favre is going to have more bad games than good games. He just doesn’t have the physical prowess to back up his football mind, and therein lays Favre’s problem.

While he may be of sound football mind, his age and the many poundings that his body has taken during his storied NFL career, has taken its toll on the 38-year-old and he won’t be as nearly capable of performing at the level coaches around the NFL expect him to.

Favre’s best days are behind him, and if I was a Jets fan I wouldn’t get my hopes up until the Jets actually make the play-offs, something Favre is supposed to help them do. I wish him and the Jets good luck with that play.

Brett Favre tosses TD pass in Jets Debut

Phelps Wins His Eight Gold Medal, Time For Him To Cash In

As expected U.S. swimmer Michael Phelps kicked as in the pool at the 2008 Beijing Olympics and won 8 gold medals, and along with becoming the biggest winning athlete in Olympic history, the “endorsement” world is now his oyster.

Phelps is going to make more money from endorsement deals than any other gold medal winning Olympian in history. I also have no doubt in my mind that come four years time there will be even more gold medal wins for the swimmer in London, and that his efforts there will garner the kind of money PGA golfer Tiger Woods is paid for his endorsement deals, if not sooner. Kaaching

Before jumping in the water at the Water Cube, Phelps was hauling in $US5 million a year in endorsement deals from PowerBar, Omega, AT&T Wireless, Kellogg’s, Speedo, Adidas and Visa to name a few.

And lets not forget what he is going to earn in the immediate future, which I hear is around $US30M that in the next year. Kaaching, kaaching.

Australian celebrity agent Max Markson, although a little touched in the head at times, says Phelps is the “Billion Dollar Man,” that he’ll never have to work the rest of his life, but if he chooses to do so, he’s an international brand and will be able to earn money anywhere in the world.

Short of calling him a “Billion Dollar Man”, I do agree that Phelps earning potential is far greater than any of us want to believe.

The man is a moneymaking machine, and from this moment on (unless he’s stupid), will be rich beyond his wildest dreams.

Now money aside, I have never heard mention of a girlfriend in his life, nada, not a word. Did I miss something, or is he gay, not that there’s anything wrong with that. I just want to know.

Phelps wins 8th gold; breaks tie with Spitz

Michael Phelps: Swimming in dough?

PGA Bending the Rules a Wie Bit-Setting Teenage Sensation Up For More Failure

For starters, what in the hell is wrong with PGA tour event organizers, and why are they bending over backwards for Michelle Wie, the teenage sensation who has yet to really prove she is a sensation? Can you believe those dolts have announced that she will tee off against the men in the Legends Reno-Tahoe Open next week, this despite the fact that not only has she proven that she isn’t ready to compete at such a higher level, but that there are other more capable women on the LPGA tour that will at the very least would be a better challenge to their male counterparts over 72 holes than the fragile 18-year-old who at the moment is playing for life just to gain a spot on next year’s LPGA tour.

Let’s be realistic here, does anybody really think that including Wie in next week’s tournament in Nevada is going to be good for her, let alone the PGA given that a) she has proven time and time again that she can’t compete with the men, at least if past performances are anything to go by, and b) she is being used as the freak in a show by the PGA to boost ticket sales. The PGA is not only setting her up for failure, but at the same time they are turning a PGA event into a novelty act without giving any thought to Wie’s emotional stability and well-being should she as expected, fail to make the cut.

It’s no secret that Wie wants to compete on the same level as the men, but should she be extended an invitation because she wants to compete against the men, instead of being invited because she can compete with the men? Of course there is no evidence that she is an accomplished enough golfer to mount a challenge to anybody on the PGA Tour.

If she is struggling competing on the LPGA circuit, why would anybody think that she could make it on the men’s circuit, and why is it that she is given special status to compete in such an event when there are far more talented and composed women on the LPGA circuit who would be a bigger draw in Reno than Wie? It doesn’t make sense.

Nevertheless, Wie will be in the field, but not because of her talent. She’ll be there because somebody thinks she’ll sell tickets to an event that has one of the weakest fields on the PGA circuit, which in turn means fewer ticket sales. Unfortunately for Wie though, this tournament isn’t going to give her the emotional boost she needs if as expected, she bombs out and fails to make the cut in yet another men’s event.

Maybe it’s just me, but PGA executives are steering the tour in the wrong direction at the expense of bruising a teenager’s ego more than it has already has been.

The way I see it, at the rate Wie is going, and at the rate she is being pushed to excel, she is going to need more psychological counselling than she has talent on the golf course if those who are coaching her continue with what I feel is an unrealistic expectation for the moment; the ability to compete and challenge on men’s circuit.

NFL Players Like Donte Nicholson Need To Be Reeled In Or Sacked By League

Donte Nicholson is a nobody in the NFL, the proof is in the fact that since being drafted in the fifth round in 2005 by the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, he has played all of 11 games spread out over three seasons and there is nary a mention of him by sportscasters. That is until now.

It seems that the reserve safety might have a bit of a problem with authority.

This past weekend outside a Florida nightclub where Nicholson and his room-mate Torrey Robinson were refused entry by bouncers, a scuffle ensued in which Nicholson had to be tasered by sheriff’s deputy when he chose to ignore a police directive, and was taken into custody before being released on a $300 bond.

Nicholson is yet another in a long line of NFL players who think they are above the law, and therefore have no respect for the law, and I think it’s about time the NFL came down heavy on players for such behaviour.

Maybe it’s time league officials drafted or reinvented a player’s code of conduct that has teeth in it, one that actually makes players just as accountable for their violent behaviour off the field as they are on the field. Far too often in the sports pages of newspapers and in television broadcasts we are hearing about NFL players who for whatever reason, don’t feel they are obligated to obey the laws that all Americans are expected to abide by, and the worst part of it is that most of those players who are breaking laws are repeat offenders. Its bullshit and the more often we hear about NFL players getting into trouble with law, the more of a disgrace it becomes.

Donte Nicholson won’t be the last muscle-headed football player who gets in trouble with the law before the 2008-09 season starts, but the sooner the NFL starts taking this particular off field problem more seriously, the sooner the problem will end.

As for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers management, they need to step up and make an example of Nicholson, and send a clear and harsh message to present and future Buccaneers that civil disobedience towards authority off the field, or any criminal activity for that matter, could be the deciding factor on whether or not said player has an NFL career. In fact all NFL teams should step up and send that message to players.

How about a “two or three strikes and you’re out rule,” that might change a few player’s attitude don’t ya think?

Enough with the bullshit, clean up the NFL commissioner, and do it before it get’s any worse than it already is.

Michael Jordan Labelled Bad Tipper By Las Vegas Hospitality Workers

You would think that somebody who is worth about $US400 million would be a good tipper when they are out on the town enjoying good food, or clubbing, but when it comes to Michael Jordan he’s nothing but a cheap, arrogant asshole who thinks that he is doing a restaurant or nightclub a favour and that no tip is necessary for the over-the-top service the hospitality industry covets him and other celebrities with every time they enter a restaurant or nightclub. It’s bullshit, and if Michael Jordan ever walked away from me after catering to his every whim and need without leaving a tip, I’d go out of my way to embarrass the shit out of the ungrateful bastard.

That said; there is a story from Las Vegas that says that Jordan frequents a popular nightclub there, and that it is a rare occasion where he has to pay for a drink. Personally speaking, as a former bartender, and nightclub manager I would have never ever given him an on-the-house drink. I would have expected him to pay for them, and I couldn’t have cared less if he or she was a sports celebrity or not.

Which reminds me, during my days as a bartender I met a lot of professional athletes and not one of them ever expected a free drink from me, though admittedly I have offered them one only to be knocked back.

His nickname should be changed from “Air Jordan” to “Air-O-Gance.” And to think I thought Andy Dick was the only dickhead I would blog about today.

Too Many Punches To The Head Ends Junior Welterweight Contender’s Chance At Title Shot

While it has yet to be confirmed I think it’s pretty safe to assume that the boxing career of Edgar “El Chamaco” Santana is finished before it barely got of the ground.

The junior welterweight contender was among 12 people arrested on charges of taking part in an international cocaine trafficking ring, and unless he was forced into being part of the drug trafficking ring, something I really doubt, or he suffered enough blows to his head to render him not responsible for his actions, I would have to say that this guy is as stupid as he is talented in the ring.

El Chamaco, who has a record of 24 wins (15 by KO) and 3 losses since he turned pro, was scheduled as the main event on a card that was to be televised on ESPN on August 6, but the only main event he’ll be appearing in now is the one he’ll be making when he answers to his charges. What an idiot.

Headline: Contender Santana, 11 others charged in cocaine trafficking ring

So if Brett Favre wants to continue to play football for the “love of the game,” then it only makes sense that he would play for “peanuts” right? He certainly doesn’t need the money, and he certainly isn’t worth even half as much as he was a few years ago, not to mention whatever talent he has left (and I don’t think there’s much, that last year was a fluke) definitely doesn’t justify a multi-million one-year deal. So it only makes sense, he should play for the love of the game, and money shouldn’t be an issue.

For any team to get Favre’s signature on the dotted line, a one-year contract worth a million dollars and laced with bonus incentives, should be more than enough for what I think is his limited services. By the way, I don’t think the Green Bay Packers are the only team that would relegate Favre to a back-up role, and if he wants to come back for his love of the game, then he should be receptive to any team that offers him a back-up role. I also think he would be a good mentor for some of the younger, less experienced quarterbacks looking to steal the top job from other quarterbacks throughout the NFL, but I really don’t think Favre has enough in the tank to be a starter anymore. I mean think about it; in Green Bay he took quite a beating year in and year out, and there’s a lot of miles on his battered body. As fit as he might be, I’d have to question his stamina, and his ability to not only avoid injuries, but to heal from them.

At the end of the day if Favre wants to play football, then he should be allowed to play football, the game owes him that much. Otherwise, I don’t think he should be making demands, setting out the terms and conditions of his return to football, after it was him who left the game in the first place, not the other way around.

And another thing, if he is going to return, he should honour whatever is left of his Green Bay contract. It’s the right thing to do, and besides whom would he have been without the Green Bay Packers? The Green Bay Packers and their fans have been very good to Favre, and the least he can do is show them a little more respect than he has been showing them since his announcement that he was considering coming out of retirement.

Favre should suck it up and honour whatever is left of his contract in Green Bay by coming a back as a backup quarterback to Aaron Rogers. If he wants to play football that bad, then he should be satisfied with that.

One other thing, if Favre is struggling with having to leave the game, maybe he should seek some sort of counselling, perhaps even psychiatric treatment. It’s pretty obvious to me by his actions of late, he is having trouble coping with life without football, and professional help might help him cope with his transition into retirement.

Headline: GM, Coach: If Favre returns, it’s as a backup

Headline: Favre was ‘never fully committed’ to retiring

Headline: Curran: Packers owe Favre nothing at this point

Headline: Favre to Fox News: Packers should let me play elsewhere

Headline: Nearly 200 fans stump at Lambeau for Favre’s return as starting quarterback

2004 Stanley Cup winners, the Tampa Bay Lightening, haven’t amounted to much after they defeated the Calgary Flames in the 04 Stanley Cup finals, and I doubt they are going to amount to very much just because they have signed Vincent Lecavalier to a lifetime deal. It would be stupid for anybody to think that because Lecavalier has committed the rest of his professional hockey playing career on paper to the Lightning that the Lightning’s fortunes are going to improve enough to make them legitimate Stanley Cup contenders anytime soon. They have a lot of work ahead of them in rebuilding their team to a level where they can actually be considered contenders, and one big name does not make a Stanley Cup team. Think about it all you hockey fans in Tampa who just might happen to stumble upon this blog entry, do you really think Lecavalier is going to bring another Stanley Cup to Tampa Bay during his lifelong commitment to a team that has no idea how to build around a franchise player like Lecavalier. The Lightening got lucky in 2004, and since then they have taken that Stanley Cup winning team apart player by player, and have looked pretty average in the following seasons since their Stanley Cup win.

That said, I wonder what motivated Lecavalier to sign a lifetime contract with a team that has about as much chance of winning a Stanley Cup in the next 10 years as any team in Russia’s Continental Hockey League. And what makes Tampa Bay think that Lecavalier is the man to build a team around for such an improbable likelihood, another Stanley Cup in say 10-15 years?

Being a Canadian boy who grew up living and breathing ice hockey, I would have thought Lecavalier would have wanted at least one more Stanley Cup before his career begins to fizzle out and he is worth nothing in the NHL, but I guess money talks, and the more money somebody pays him, the less important his personal quest for another Stanley Cup becomes. He will never convince me that he signed a lifetime deal with the Lightening because he likes their chances of winning a Stanley Cup before his career comes to an end. I’m not that stupid. The only reason he signed on the dotted line was because of greed, not for his love of the game, and certainly not for another opportunity to win a Stanley Cup. Of course his agent will be thrilled about the deal; he’ll get a nice little slice from the “Lecavalier” pie.

Headline: Bolts’ Lecavalier formally inks $85M deal

When it comes to deadbeat fathers, I don’t have any use for them, even after they make good on court ordered child support payments to pay up or go to jail. Once a deadbeat dad, always a deadbeat dad. If a father is prepared to look out for the best interests of his child out spite for the mother or whatever, he isn’t much of a father, and he’ll get no sympathy from me. The same can be said about deadbeat moms.

Evander Holyfield is a deadbeat dad believe or not. He has failed to live up to his obligation to his child, but to avoid going to jail for his irresponsible and uncaring act of spite and selfishness, he has managed to hand over a check for $9000.00 and agreed to re-instate his 10-year-old son’s health insurance, pay for his private school fees and expenses, make sure there is a college trust fund in place for him and pay some legal bills incurred by his ex because of his act of ignorance and child neglect.

Making good on his responsibilities to his son is one thing, but Holyfield if he was any kind of a man, should have never used his parental responsibilities as leverage to exact some sort of payback from the mother of his child. Once a “deadbeat dad” always a “deadbeat dad.”

Headline: Holyfield pays $9000 to settle child-support case

Sports Superstars Marry Really Dumb Women Don’t They?

You know, when it comes to women who have been cheated on by their husbands, there are some real suckers out there. There’s Hilary Clinton for example, despite her presidential husband’s philandering ways, she stayed with him, and to this day I bet Bill is still getting a little something on the side. I find it hard to believe that Mr. Clinton has changed his ways. You know what they say about leopards.

Then of course there are the women who are married to some the sporting world’s top earners. Man, some of those women should have the letter “S” tattooed to their forward. Why do these women stay with husbands who are obviously not a one woman man?

Michael Jordan’s wife was sucked in when he was caught f**king around on her, but she stayed with him, only to divorce him later on. Don’t get me wrong, she cashed in big time, but she was stupid to believe that her marriage could be repaired. Then there’s Kobe Bryant’s wife, she’s just as stupid as the former Mrs. Jordan.

Again, I’m reminded of what they say about leopards and spots.

Now comes word that Shaquille O’Neal’s wife is having a change of heart, that the divorce she filed last year because Shaq was f**king around on her, may not be in the cards anymore. They were spotted together over the July 4th weekend, and they looked like the happily married couple everybody expected them to be when they first said their I dos. Sources are reporting that there has been no movement on the divorce case. I guess one could easily assume that another pro-athlete’s wife is ready for the tattoo parlour.

Former NFLer Rams The Wrong Woman, Facing 15 Years In Jail

Has any of Da Shitz’s readers ever heard of Antonio “Tony” Zendejas, before now I had never heard of him? Obviously he never made much of an impact in the NFL; otherwise I’m sure I would have heard of him before now. Maybe I have heard of him, but only in passing.

Anyway, he has been arrested and charged with drugging a woman and then raping her. He says he’s innocent, well actually his lawyer is saying that Zendejas says he is innocent.

I don’t know about everybody else, but if he’s so innocent, why doesn’t he come out and say so himself, instead of having his lawyer read a prepared statement for him?

I get a kick out of people who hire other people to plead their case in public rather then in a courtroom.

I don’t believe that Zendejas is innocent for one second. Lucky for him the woman is claiming she was drugged because now he can use that as a defence. He’s likely thinking that if she was drugged, she couldn’t possibly know what happened to her, and he’ll play that angle for sure if he wants to avoid going to jail for any length of time, never mind 15 years.

Guilty or not, he has a better chance of getting off on the charge then prosecutors will have proving his accuser’s allegation.

Of course there’s the possibility that Zendejas could settle out of court too to avoid a very public and embarrassing trial, something any restaurateur can ill afford. If that does happen, it will cast doubt on just how innocent the former L.A. Ram really is and his restaurant business might suffer any way.

Guilty or not, I expect to hear a lot of bad things about his character from a few different sources, especially if the case makes it trial, and I doubt they will be very flattering.

Headline: Former Ram kicked with Felony Rape Charges

Headline: Zendejas charged with four felony counts

Ex Mrs. Norman Wins $100 Million Skin Without Sinking A Putt

Greg Norman is feeling a little lighter in the wallet these days, but not enough to worry about, given he is worth about three-quarters of a billion dollars these days.

Norman, who recently married former tennis pro Chris Everett in a lavish ceremony in the Caribbean, has been ordered to hand over to his last wife $101M in cash and assets, or about one seventh of his worth. That’s not bad for a scorned wife, a wife whose husband cheated on her with Norman’s best friend’s wife, the then Chris Everett-Lloyd. The soon-to-be ex Mrs. Rodriguez should be so lucky.

By the way, it looks good on Norman. He got exactly what he deserved in my opinion. Any man who cheats on his wife deserves much worse in my opinion, but I’m sure his ex-wife is more than pleased with the outcome. Cheers to her!

Headline: Golf’s Biggest Choker Swallows $100 Mil Payout

In ten days home run king Barry Bonds will be ready to play ball, problem is though, and nobody wants him. Gee I wonder why?

Sucks to Barry Bonds!

By the year 2010 Tiger Woods will become the first professional athlete to earn a billion dollars. Problem is though; the majority of those billion dollars comes from endorsement deals, and not from his club swinging. He’s good at his game, but a lot of those billion dollars he will have earned by then will be for the use of his name, and not for playing golf. Put an asterisk beside his name in the record books

And another thing, what’s he going to do with all that money, he can’t take it with him when he dies? Maybe he should pull an “Oprah” and build a golfing academy in a Third World country.

Jacksonville Jaguar Matt Jones has been busted after police spotted him and two other men sitting in a vehicle chopping up cocaine with a credit card. Gee, with the kind of money football players are paid these days, the minimum salary nothing to sneeze at; you would think that Jones would have invested in a half decent gold razor blade. Of all the dumb ways to get caught with drugs, sitting in a parked vehicle prepping your next line of coke. The NFL should act immediately and decisively, and suspend him immediately. NFL owners should get their shit together and impose mandatory minimum suspensions on players who are arrested on even the most minor of drug offences.

Boy that A-Rod certainly believes in the sanctimony of marriage doesn’t he? Now a stripper has come forward and said she spent two nights in the same bed with Madonna’s latest sex toy. Gee, you would think with the kind of money A-Rod makes, he would have been smart enough to give the sex-trade worker enough money to keep her mouth shut about her tryst with the Yankee slugger back in 2007.

And now there’s word that his scorned wife Cynthia has threatened to release steamy text messages that A-Rod sent to Madonna, texts that will prove A-Rod’s relationship with Madonna was more than just friendship. If The Sun story is true, and Cynthia does have such texts, than she shouldn’t have any problem receiving most of the $100M divorce settlement she is asking for.

Jose Canseco has come forward with some claims about Madonna himself. According to Canseco, the “Material Girl welcomed him into her Los Angeles home in 1991 and during his visit she played a video in which she was involved in a masturbation scene and proceeded to come onto him. Lucky him, but according to Canseco he became a little uncomfortable with the situation because he was trying to work things out with his wife.

He also claims that Madonna wanted to have his baby.

I can’t wait to hear what former New York Ranger Mark Messier has to say about his relationship with Madonna, if he says anything at all, and I suspect that former Chicago Bull Dennis Rodman is going to weigh in with his two cents worth pretty soon, if he hasn’t already. Boy when it comes to professional athletes Madonna sure got around. I wonder if she ever propositioned David Beckham, and if she did, would Beckham tell us.

Headline: Bonds’ agent: ‘I am not talking to any club

Headline: Tiger Woods, the $1 billion man

Headline: Jaguars’ Matt Jones is arrested on drug charge

Headline: Ex-Stripper Claims, She Had Sex With A-Rod Twice!

Headline: A-Rod’s wife threatens to make his texts to Madonna public

Headline: Jose Canseco claims Madonna wanted his baby, magazine sez

It would seem that Crooked in Canada doesn’t have enough blogs listed to make any money from affiliates and sponsors, and with that in mind “Da Shitz on Sportz” blog has been created to fill that void, and to add more amusement for fans and foes of Crooked in Canada as well as myself.

Say what you will about me, but at the end of the day I am addicted to blogging and really get off on blogging about shit I would otherwise ignore in the real world I’m supposed to be living in.

Don’t get me wrong, I do have a real life, but in that real life there are only so many people that I socialize with in my family and in the community, and not all of those people are always interested in what I want to talk about, like the goings on in the sports world, where some athletes are over-paid, over-hyped, and carry on like they are better than everybody else sometimes. Of course there are those athletes who excel at what they do and earn their inflated incomes while keeping their wits about them, but as we all know there are athletes past and present who too often make sports headlines for all the wrong reasons.

There’s O.J. Simpson who many think got away with murder and is currently charged with forcible confinement, robbery, and a couple of other offenses and his day in court is coming. Then there’s Michael Vick who is currently incarcerated for his inhumane treatment of man’s best friend. And let’s not forget about all that steroid bullshit that has been making the news in professional baseball and amateur sports

Other disgraced athletes include Marion Jones, Ben Johnson, Jose Canseco, Roger Clemens, a bunch of National Hockey League players including their wives (remember Janet Jones-Gretzky and her gambling?).

The list of disgraced athletes goes on and on and there isn’t enough hours left in today for me to google them all and blog about them in here, but it’s not like I’m on a deadline to mention them all, and in due time the list of disgraced athletes in Da Shitz on Sportz will grow with each passing day, week, month or year. In the world of sports there is no shortage of athletes who have f**ked up ( Mike Tyson just came to mind) and slowly but surely Mr. Shitz is going to go out of his way to reveal most, if not all of them.

Of course there are more fine upstanding athletes who are better role models for today’s youth and I intend to give them more than their fair share of mentions in Da Shitz on Sportz (DSS) too. There’s Ernie Els (PGA) who is hooked into to doing a public service for children with autism, and then there’s Daniel Alfredsson (NHL) who because his sister sufferance with depression, is doing his bit for those who suffer from what has become known as the “Black Dog”. Like the list of disgraced athletes, the list of humanitarian athletes goes and on and on. Readers of DSS can be sure that they will definitely get many, many mentions.

There are a lot of professional sports teams to blog about in DSS too, not too many championship teams like the new reigning champions of the NBA, the Boston Celtics and of course the winners of this year’s hockey holy grail, the Detroit Red Wings. And lets not forget the NFL’s New York Giants, didn’t they stick it good to perennial favourites the New England Patriots and quarterback Tom Brady. Geez, did the Giants ever do a number on them in the Super Bowl, and because of the effort on the football field, a lot of smug Pats fans lost a shitload of money and spent the better part of the rest of their day following the game moping around and crying in their beers. It looked good on them.

That being said, this is all I have to say in this, the first blog entry in DSS, and I’m looking forward to sharing my thoughts on all that is sports for sometime to come.

Cheers, and I look forward to hearing your thoughts on what I have to say in DSS.